It's OK to be a feminist.

Bill Bailey is a feminist.

I hear a lot of smart, powerful women say things like "I'm not a feminist," or "I'm not sure if I'm a feminist," and it's exasperating to me.

Friends, a feminist is NOT the man hating analogue of a misogynist.

When I was 16 years old, a male (interestingly) history teacher broke it down for me:

"All that being a feminist means is that you believe men and women are equal, and deserve equal rights."

That's all it means, and it's all it has to mean for you, if you like. But you are a probably a feminist, even if the label scares you. I know there is a lot of intimidating dogma and extremist views around what it means to be a feminist. Anyone who tells you that you have to do anything more than believe that men and women are equal is projecting their agenda onto you, and you can still call yourself a feminist even if you don't subscribe to their ideology.

You can shave off all your body hair, wear lipstick and high heels and be a feminist.

You can be a man and be a feminist.

You can be a BD/SM submissive, even a female slave owned by a male master, and be a feminist.

You can be a stay at home mom and be a feminist.

You can disagree with what you read on Jezebel or Feministing and still be a feminist.

But please, call yourself a feminist. Teach people that feminist is not a dirty word, and it doesn't mean you hate men, or judge people whose lifestyles are different from your own. It doesn't automatically mean you think women are better than men. It just means you are you, and you love women as humans and want to see them enjoy human equality.

Feminism is not keeping you from anything you are/do unless you are in fact a misogynist. In which case, I encourage you rethink your views, for your momma's sake, if nobody else's.